My Family

So I am thinking about adding a new furbaby to my family. I have blogged about my current family before. I love them very much but I saw this girl was getting ready to be euthanized, and I just couldn't let it happen. I totally fell instantly in love. I called and asked them to make sure she would be safe until I could get there on Saturday. Jenny and I will drive there (about 1.5 hrs) to meet her and see if they get along. I went and bought her some toys and treats for a present from Jenny. I hope she gets along with cats. If not, I will at least pay for her sponsorship so she will not be euthanized, and someone from a rescue group can get her for free. Just because she can't hunt, doesn't mean she shouldn't be able to live. And yes she barks, she's a dog for heavens sake. I wish we could euthanize people who don't work and lie most times they open their mouths. I better stop there, or I will continue to say mean things and I don't want to be that person anymore.

Even my eyelashes are sore

So I am going to need a couple of weeks to recover from the weekend. Very productive. I got about 2.5 yards of my 5 yards of dirt moved. Most of the ruts are filled in, now I just need to work on some of the old garden areas and other various holes. Jim came and pulled most of the shrub mess on the west side of the garage. I will try and post before and after pictures tonight. Actually tonight will only be part way pictures. the after pictures will have the retaining wall and driveway completed. I was going to keep moving dirt tonight, but I really need to get the laundry done, and I will work on pitching stuff out of the spare room. It need to be ready for Clinton to do my windows.

As for my cooking..... All was good. Highly recommend eggface's recipes.

Found my brother's calling in life.

My brother should run some sort of work camp for wayward children! He kicked my ass this afternoon. You can't lie to him, he's seen it all and done most of it already. And he has no mercy when you say your getting tired and the chain is starting to get real heavy. He has this way of rolling his eyes at you that basically says "Suck it up sister" and then tells you to move faster. And once I get the chain wrapped around the bush, I better not dilly dally in getting out of the way or he would have dragged me across the yard with the unwanted shrubbery. And I know he would never hit me with the tractor, but he likes to get very close and watch me scramble and yell, "That's far enough" in sheer panic. I would look up and see him laughing with that shitty grin of his. It was an interesting and productive afternoon. Maybe next time he will let me try driving the tractor. I doubt it, but I can at least start begging now.

A good start to the weekend

It was a beautiful day. Still is actually, it's only 7:11, so the day is not quite over yet. Got 5 yards of dirt today. I am still a little irked about having to actually spend money to get DIRT?? But, such is life. Mom & Dad came and helped me spread about 1/2 of it. Then it was time for them to go home. I think it totally exhausted Dad. I did a few loads after they left, but then the mower started making funny noises, so I decided to stop.

Now I have an on again off again headache, and my face feels like I might have gotten a little burnt. So I am going to get a shower, do some dishes and maybe cook a little. I'm making eggface stuffed zucchini for dinner tomorrow night, so I am going to prep what I can. I also want to make her breakfast bars and Chocolate Kahlua Ricotta Custard. I'll post how much of it I get done, and if it is any good.

Makes me feel good

I just love a coral Gerber daisy. I don't know why but it just makes me feel good to look at them.

Not sure why I chose to blog about this, but there it is. My tummy is grumbly, time for lunch.

Countdown

So its now about 8 days until the big four-oh!! I am excited that I am going to Nancy & Clinton's. They are really going all out for me. It's good to have friends such as them! I got home from work tonight and fell asleep by 5 pm. I have only been up for about 2 hrs and I am going to go back to bed. I did manage to finally capture a picture of my babies on the toy that their Grammy June made them for Christmas. Jenny is barking like crazy, that means she is ready for bed too.

Analyze this!

So here's my dream last night.

I was Tom Sawyer! And somehow I got hooked up with his scary old man. He took me in and we lived on a river. There was a younger boy that lived with us also. I was about 12 yrs old and the other boy was about 5 yrs old. At some point the old man killed someone. I didn't see it happen, I just saw him put the man's body in the river and it floated past me. Only the man wasn't really dead and he got up and came back and killed the old man. Then he started chasing me and the little boy.

We swam down the river. Going like crazy trying to avoid this zombie looking guy. We would run sometimes and swim sometimes. We finally ran into someone else, a couple of other little boys who helped us. We came to a water fall and then some rapids, but lucky for us there were some underwater steps that lead to a cave with a bunch of rope bridges that went all over. So we went in there and hid until the zombie man found us.

At that point he had a gun and he shot at all of us. We all fell into a big pool of water acting like we were dead. But really we were under water using hollow reeds to breath through. But the zombie man thought we were dead and left. Then we thanked the other boys who helped and went back to where we lived on the river. At that point I woke up.

So what does it mean? I have decided I was all three people, the crazy old man, Tom Sawyer, and the little boy. The old man being who I am now (10 days away from being 40). Tom Sawyer is sort of my emotional self. In alot of ways I never really grew beyond my early teens. I tend to hide that away, don't want to get hurt. And then the little boy is my inner child.

It seems like the actions of my 40 yr old self is affecting my emotional self and my inner child. They are having to scramble to protect themselves from the craziness I cause. What do you think?

The 40 yr old thinks it is a big load of crap, but you never know.

Spring Fairies

Just thought the world would want to know that my spring fairy name is:

Iris Twinkle-Toes

http://www.quizopolis.com/spring_fairy_name.php

Ha Ha! I think that is hysterical.

My office is just about completely unpacked. Just need to tweak a few things. There is this annoying person here talking away endlessly now. I wish I would have brought my iPod in today. His monotone voice drives me nuts. I don't know why he doesn't have any work to do. JUST GO AWAY ALREADY. He's not talking to me, he's talking with Kirk, acting all Mr. smarty pants. He is also very derogatory towards his wife, sort of like she's the typical dumb, helpless woman, kind of stuff. Makes me want to pop him in the nose.

Peach Tea

Target had small "On the Go" packets of Crystal Light Peach Tea on clearance. They were $.48 for a package of 3. I think they are too strong if you use them full strength. So I put one packet it 32 oz of water. However I have found that Fluffernutter LOVES peach tea. It is almost impossible to keep him out of my glass. Until I tried to take a picture of him caught in the act of drinking, then he stops and looks at me like he is all innocent. Now he is all cuddly and lovey. Such a silly kitty. I just love him. I remember how big he was when he was born. His mom was so tired, she could hardly clean him up, I had to help her. His belly was about twice the size of his head. He could hardly crawl around.

I'm working on a grocery list, I want to cook some good healthy meals the next couple of weeks. The rest of the day will be spent getting ready for the week. I need to do laundry, and I want to watch TLC's Big Medicine marathon this evening. I can do that and laundry at the same time.

I love blond jokes

I haven't done a quote of the week in a long time, and I just can't find a quote I liked, but I did find a pretty good blond joke.

Q: Why can't blondes make ice cubes?
A: Because they always forget the recipe.

Life in the fast lane

I have high speed! It is so exciting I don't even know where to begin. I did get a couple of songs off I tunes earlier. So much to do so little time. I'm cold! Freezing actually. Not sure why, it's nice outside. I think I am going to go get under the covers and warm up a bit. I might try to get the yard mowed, and I want to figure out my meal plan for the next couple of weeks. Depending on how I feel I might get groceries tonight.

This is for N

I didn't blog last night, I fixed the washer instead. It got all backed up, out of balance and was making the most crazy thumping noises. Fixed it, then ended up falling asleep at about 8. I went to the grocery store too. That is what tired me out. My back hurt and the top of my legs were starting to go numb. I get high speed tomorrow!!!!! I can't wait. I also get new phone service, which is also exciting. After they get it up and going I think I will get voice mail for and extra $4 a month.

So about the arm jar. I was thinking after I have my surgery we should go to one of those paint you own pottery places and make up the jars. Paint them in fun colors and stuff. I had a couple of other thoughts, like decoupage. I will have to look into what kind of stuff they have at Pat Catans.

Another thing is that a lot of people name their pouch. So I am trying to name it. Any thoughts?

I called my sis last night and told her I needed to talk to her alone, one on one. I asked her if we could meet at the Starbucks in Target one day this weekend? I told her I had something to tell her. She needed to check her schedule and she said she would get back to me. I told my mom not to tell anyone. I know it is killing her. My aunt carol spent the night with them last night, and I have a feeling she told. Now everyone will know. My mom cannot keep anything to herself. It's like bragging in a sick twisted sort of way.

I'm spending the rest of the day today packing the rest of my cube, and packing up some of Kirk's cube.

Mid morning break

Today's a busy day at work, but I thought I would take a mid morning break and do a little blogging. We are getting ready to have a cubicle rearrangement this weekend. It's a mess. Adding to the chaos I have moved the INBOX! Since the days of Adam and Eve there has been a "Construction Inbox" in my cube. Well I packed it up and it will be gone forever. That is causing some stress. Now I have a new inbox located on my desk. Before the contract admins had to take one step in my cube, reach up slightly with their right had drop their requests in the inbox on the filing cabinet. Now, they have to take one step in my cube, and reach down slightly with their left hand and drop the requests in the inbox on my desk. AAAAAUUUGGGGHHHHH, that’s too much change for the grumpy old men to take in one week. I will have to do a major cookie bake again to make up for this. Maybe I will just make a few batches of the luscious cream cheese brownies. Then once again I will be the love of their lives. Tonight I need to fix the washer and sweep the basement floor. Not sure what exactly went wrong with the washer, but I hope it will be an easy fix. I will update. I also need to call the insurance company. Might try to locate some old receipts too, just to figure out who has my weight records. I would like to get at this early, so I don't have to make all the phone calls at once, and so I have time to fill in some blanks if needed. Might start a letter about why I want the surgery too, that way it is done already, just in case. No TV. Everything is scheduled to be taped, so I will wait until Friday and have a marathon TV night.

I just might get my do over

This is truly going to be a real gift. I realized this morning that the real beauty in this is that not only do I get to start fresh. But I get to do it with a tremendous amount of knowledge. I know the outcome of poor eating habits and lack of exercise. I have lived it all my life. Now I am being given an opportunity to live a different life, to make the right choices and to experience a whole new way of life. This is a real rare opportunity and I need to make sure I get the absolute best outcome possible.

Imagine Me

So when they make the Lifetime original movie of my life story I am going to insist on having Kirk Franklin, TobyMac, and Mandisa write the theme music.

Tonight is my "educational seminar" for WLS. It's full steam ahead. I am ready to beat this addiction, no matter what it takes. Once I learn what kind of psych help they offer I will decide if I am going to contact the EAP people. I really think I am ready to start to see a therapist. Its wrong for me to keep taking Lexapro without dealing with what got me to this state. At some point I would like to wean off of it, and I need to deal with my problems. "Can't be here next year, givin' you these same tears" Thanks Kirk!!!!

The rest of the week I need to spend cleaning the basement. The washing machine is acting up so I need to deal with that also. I am going to try my hand at cooking some fish, maybe Tilapia, it cooks quick and I need to start getting more comfortable cooking it.

Back to work now. Busy week here. But that's OK because I heart my job!!!!!

Need to focus ... Need Coffee

Haven't had any caffeine yet today, and I am having a terrible time concentrating. I know everyone says that caffeine makes you eat more, but for me it is opposite. It wakes me up, helps me concentrate and I am not always shoving food in my mouth to try and keep me alert, which does nothing but make me even drowsier. I have stopped drinking pop, so my morning coffee is all I get, but I skipped it today. Not a good idea.

For some reason my blog is not blocked by my work Internet anymore, so I will be posting more again. And I am getting high speed Internet this weekend, so I can start to post from home. Maybe I will put more pics up on picasa this weekend.

I'm going to reschedule my dr's appt for later in the month. I just don't feel like dealing with it this week. I wish I didn't have to step on the scale every single time I go there. It would be different if I didn't go every month, but for heavens sake give me a break every now and then.

Well back to the grind for now.

Ready for a new life

For years I have gone through periods of time where the desire to run away has been almost more than I can handle. I have often thought of just getting in the car and driving until the road ran out then starting over again. I don't exaclty know how I would do that but I'm smart, surely I can find a way. Years ago I shared this fantasy with a friend. She asked alot of questions, mostly about what I thought I was running from. I now know that the problems I will be running from will still be there when the road runs out. I can't run from myself. I am going to do everything possible to start my life over again. I really am ready for a do-over. Fingers crossed that it is possible.