Still dealing

So I am still dealing with a little of the emotional fall out from last week. I was super scared that I would relapse and eat the house this weekend. Didn't eat the greatest, but didn't exactly binge either. It's really ok though. I have to say, in the past I would still be feeling numb and empty right now. But I'm not. I don't feel great, but I am at least feeling something. I only have to work 4 days this week. Very happy about that. Going to really try to get the house in order with the time off. Not going to be ready for a magazine or anything, but not so bad that I am embarrassed if someone came to the door.

So, something that's occupying my mind right now. The black and white thinking of BPD. I just don't totally understand that concept. I had several episodes this past week that I need to put into perspective. I had very intense emotional regulation issues. I still don't know the real trigger, looking back it seems totally irrational. I am going to write some of the stuff down and talk with Dr. Kessler about it. I just need to figure out a healthier way of dealing with this stuff.